The Grammar Princess

My friend Abby is the Grammar Princess. If I had a digital picture of her dressed up as such, I might even post it. But I don't. You'll just have to imagine her gown, crown, and very important magic grammar wand. In contrast, I am just a former college newspaper editor, with a glammed-up rhinestone and fluff tiara to show for it (oh, darn, no digital pictures from the college era). But right now I would like to borrow the grammar princess' wand and eliminate certain grammatical annoyances from academic work.

My first target would be "firstly. "Firstly" is, alas, a word. But it is a word that should be destroyed. It serves no useful purpose. "First" handles all jobs quite well. Note, for example, that I could have written, "Firstly, I would destroy 'firstly.'" But really, "First, I would destroy 'firstly'" sounds so much better.

End grammar rant. [And I promise not to judge your blog for the use of "firstly." Ok, maybe I will, but only a tiny bit. This issue is far more grating in already turgid academic prose (because non-turgid academic prose -- which does exist for all you doubtors out there -- would never deign to use "firstly" in the first place).]

To make up for my digression into grammar, I offer you some amusing and sardonic (amusingly sardonic? sardonically amusing?) TypeTees from threadless (many of which are currently on sale):

Find it, you know, um, over here.

Craisins, however, are allowed to stay in.
Available here.

Maybe scissors wants to join the fun.
Go here.